Are you hoping to get into a relationship before the year runs out? Or are you in one and don’t know what you are doing there? Then this post is for you.
To the singles in the house, here are few questions to ask yourself before going into your next relationship and if you are already caught up in such web, you also need this to ask yourself this deep questions before knowing your next step.
Being in a relationship shouldn’t be non profitable, and just like business, both parties in a relationship hope to gain from each other and add to each other.
It is quite shocking and devastating when you ask ladies what they want from a relationship and they barely have no idea of what they want and what they have to offer. This is why many ladies end up being subjected to an abusive relationship because they never took time out to orientate and school themselves in the world of love.
So before you venture into your next relationship, take out time to answer these few questions so you can confidently know what you what and what you don’t want.
1) What is love? What does relationship entails? : Before you delve into a relationship, take the time to ask yourself these questions. Most times, what you think is love could be infatuation, obsession or rebound. There are many who mistake these 3 for love and that is why they end up in an entanglement without knowing how to breakthrough. After finding out what love is and if your feelings for your partner is one of love, try to know as much as you can about relationship. It is wrong to step into something you have zero knowledge of! Thanks to the world of social media, you can find out all you want to know about relationship: what it entails, it’s dos and donts, responsibilities, and lots more.
2) Are you matured for it? : Relationship is not for the faint hearted, it is not beans and bread. It takes a lot of maturity to be able to handle the downside and snags that comes with it. A lot of ladies are in relationships that they are not yet ready for. They assume that they are ready for it because of their age, but in reality, they are still babies and toddlers.
3) What do you want and need in a relationship? : Ask yourself the reason why you are going into one. Are you just dating because your friends are or are you dating because your parents pressured you into one? Only you can figure this out.
4) What are your plans for the relationship? : Ask yourself if you are dating just to while out time or to build a home. Find out your short term, intermediate or long term for it.
5) What do I bring to the relationship? : What do you have to offer to your man? if it is only sex you have, then you are heeding nowhere. No man wants to marry a non valuable woman. Every man desires a woman who can add to him, his business, his growth, his ideas and knowledge. So dears, make sure you have something valuable to offer to him.
6) What are your Red Flags? : What are your flaws and weaknesses? Are you the type that cannot cook or do any house chores, are you hot tempered,lazy, stubborn, strong headed, arrogant, impatient, etc; then obviously you need to work on it.
7) What are your Green Flags? : What are your strengths, good traits and attributes? You need to know this as it will help you in your relationship.
8) What are those things that you can’t compromise to? : What are those things you can not accommodate or compromise to? For me, I can’t accommodate a disorganized man because I love things being in it’s right position.No matter how much I love you, this is non negotiable.
9) What are your Boundaries? : You need to set boundaries for yourself. There should be a limit to how you do things and what you can and cannot take. You need to know your physical, sexual, intellectual and financial boundaries.
10) What are your Fears? : Everyone has something they are scared of, that keeps them frightened and vulnerable. You need to find out your fears! Could it be fear of the unknown, fear of loneliness, fear of being perfect? Whatever it is, you need to dig it out yourself.
So dear ladies, these are some of the questions you need to ask yourself before committing to a man. Would do a follow up to this post as there are more questions you will need to find out yourself.
Remember dont limit yourself and never settle for less cause you are worth more than you think.
By Mercy Imuekemhe